The Story on Page One (1959)

Alfred Ryder: Lt. Mike Morris

Quotes 

• Lt. Mike Morris : Where do you two come off going and take the kid's part against me? For two cents, I'd go up and fan her behind!

• Jo Morris : Mike, I think you better go.

  Lt. Mike Morris : What?

  Jo Morris : I think you better go to work.

  Lt. Mike Morris : Oh, yeah. I know, what's your hurry. Here's your hat. Hello, goodbye!

• Lt. Mike Morris : You wearin' a girdle? You look as slim as an Italian pistol.

  Jo Morris : I never had any problem about hips.

• Lt. Mike Morris : I know, I know, I sometimes dish it out; but, you don't take things light enough. I mean, you don't think when I say I'll kick her in the slats, the kid, I really mean it?

  Jo Morris : What's important is whether Avis thinks you mean it.

  Lt. Mike Morris : It's nice havin' a head like you at home.

• Lt. Mike Morris : [after squeezing Jo's breast and she rejects his advances]  What's your private name for me? Poison Ivy? Don't forget, kid, in my trade I can get it any place! They put out and I take!

• Lt. Mike Morris : That's my missus. Champagne taste with beer money. That's my missus.

• Lt. Mike Morris : A man likes to get a little credit in his own home. Don't that ever occur to ya? Even a dog wags his tail when you throw him a bone. Did you hear what I said? All you know is to take my paycheck when I bring it home.

  Jo Morris : I left the phone company job at $90 a week to marry you and I just as soon get it back.

  Lt. Mike Morris : That'll be the day. Over my dead body, that'll be the day.